Just imagine the queue at the pearly gates as St Peter and co. deal with this man and his enormous baggage stuffed full of pride, greed and lies. Phew! Rather them than me.
The former Prime Minister was in his element yesterday when rolled out in an attempt to divert Labour people voting for the candidate of their choice in the Leadership race. How quaint: voting for a candidate of your choice. Sounds all-too disturbingly like democracy for Labour chiefs. But I digress.
Positively glowing with health, the tan was orange, the teeth super white and the grin as supercilious as ever. No doubt he was charging his friends at Labour the usual $10,000 a minute for his ‘services...’
He warned of terrible times ahead should the party dare to elect Jeremy Corbyn. No wonder Blair has little time for the likes of Jeremy Corbyn, for here is a man dedicated to the cause of social justice, a man trying to use his position to create a more equal and progressive society.
Corbyn, as far as I can gather, is that all too rare species: a politician with integrity and principle. ‘Hath he a daily beauty in his life, that makes you feel ugly,’ Mr Blair?
But then the real sting in the tail. For a moment I could not believe what I was hearing. Had this sun-tanned hyena with fake American drawl really said what I thought he had?
Yes he had! Blair had actually said ‘we.’
Now ordinarily ‘we’ is a pretty inoffensive pronoun, used to denote things in common, things shared, but when used by Blair during his speech, it took on a particularly invidious character.
Had Blair really said that word?
Yes, he had! When referring to Mr Corbyn, the ex-Prime Minister had indeed said, ‘We cannot afford to go back to a leftist Labour party,’ or words to that effect.
But who the heck, I wondered are ‘we.’ It took me a few moments to realise that he was actually referring to the Labour party! Blimey I thought: is he still faking an allegiance to socialism and Labour politics after all these years? Crikey, this guy is the limit.
When he had said ‘we’ I automatically assumed he was referring to the elitist, public schoolboy, Oxbridge, Tory-boy, silver-spoon set to which he has, and always will, belong. I was shocked, though perhaps I shouldn’t have been; it’s the sheer effrontery of this man that shocks.
For here is a man who was quite happy to start an illegal war in Iraq in order to keep his good buddy George W Bush and his other American friends sweet – one which has sent hundreds of British servicemen and women to their deaths – so he could build a lucrative, post-political career largely based around US media and commercial interests.
For here is a man who is now busily amassing millions of pounds by exploiting his former government position and contacts. Well I guess those four multi-million pound London mansions purchased for each one of his offspring have to be paid for somehow…
The list goes on and on.
A few years ago this man underwent a sudden conversion to Catholicism. I had to laugh. Perhaps the man really did believe his own press. I mean after pulling the wool over so many people’s eyes for so long (remember he is a socialist), I suppose it’s understandable that he thought he could also pull the wool over the eyes of the big man up there in the skies too.
Quick conversion, even quicker confession, absolution and bingo! All his considerable sins washed away. Well, it might work for your average catholic, but somehow I doubt it will fool the man upstairs now, do you Tony? The problem is he's omnisicient.
God I mean, not Blair. Meanwhile, judgement day gets ever closer…
Good luck with that one, Tone.