It might seem an extreme course of action but thin-voiced call centre boss and part-time scout leader Joe (Con O’Neil) goes ahead and does just that. Bedroom, lounge, kitchen, hallway….soon the modest Welsh semi that is chez Joe is rigged up to such an extent that it would put NASA to shame.
In order to spy on his wife Belinda (Jill Halfpenny), Joe is obliged to spend ever more time in the workplace toilet where he frequently disappears with er… his laptop. In the seclusion of his toilet cubicle, the sneaky peeping Tom spies on his own household. Elaborate as well as utterly bizarre.
At home he is obliged to take his faithful laptop down the garden shed from where he can spy…on his own house! Surely it would be easier to conceal himself under the marital bed like all good cuckolds?
And so, sat on his favourite toilet seat, Joe sees something that shakes him to the core: his teenage son snogging teenage neighbour. Shock! Horror! The girl in question is not yet 16! The fact that teenagers snog comes as somewhat of a bombshell to our Joe.
Meanwhile there’s a close call for the closed circuit TV system when the fire alarms refuse to go off during one particularly smoky evening meal. It seems you can’t have fire alarms and closed circuit TV working contiguously. It’s one or the other.
Phew! Joe’s secret spying system thwarts detection, but only just.
If it’s twists you want Ordinary Lies has got ‘em by the barrel load. As Joe sits in a pub pumping himself up before he downs his pint in one, his wife is busily pursuing her own secretive endeavour - hunting paedophiles, as you do.
Closed circuit TV, spying and paedophilia… who would have guessed?
But it doesn’t end there, oh no.
It transpires that Joe and Belinda’s 14 yr old daughter has been previously assaulted by a paedophile and mum is now intent on revenge. “You can’t catch them all,” cautions hubby in an emotionally charged scene which takes place in an underground NCP.
Be assured this is not your average family - this lot are about as far from ordinary as it gets. Eureka! Now I get it... that title is ironic...
Back in the office, the tele sales staff are shagging one another in alley-ways and balancing rather precariously on railings. What, with his spying and paedophilia, not to mention regular meetings down at Alcoholics Anonymous and duties as a scout leader, Joe has taken his eye off the ball. It’s anarchy at the office.
Busy, just doesn’t even get near describing this guy’s life.
Further solace from his crazy life comes in the form of a chat and ciggy with a junior co-worker who informs his boss of his first encounter with a vagina: “I didn’t expect to find so many folds of skin…”
Ordinary Lies is a fairly typical piece of BBC melodrama. Provided you don’t question the internal logic, character, motivation, dialogue and plot, there's every chance you might actually like this.