As crazy as it sounds, among some very worthwhile projects, there are also a significant number of individuals who are doing just that, having their pet projects, hobbies and interests financed by our money. But just how do they manage to do this? It’s all about the magic words. Read on.
The first magic word is ‘community.’ Now if you can persuade those fair-minded folk at the lottery commission and/or the local council that your pet project will benefit not just yourself, but the wider community, then you are already halfway to a windfall of public dosh.
Thus, if you can convince the powers-that-be that your model railway will be enjoyed by the ‘community’ then you really are well on the road to turning your hobby into a public expense. And if you can persuade any person with a physical or cognitive impairment to come experience your railway so much the better - the money will simply roll in.
But don’t worry. You don’t have to really share your railway with the wider public. Provided you can allocate the odd afternoon for some members of minority groups to watch the trains whistle past, then the rest of the time the railway will be all yours.
If you happen to have friends from different cultures, LGBTs or perhaps you know of a battered wife or husband, then just invite them all down for a ‘community train day’. Be sure though to extol the restorative and socially cohesive powers of ‘community’ model train watching. Remind everybody how model train watching is a force for good.
By now you might well have guessed that the second magic word is ‘inclusion.’ Your railway ought to include others, it cannot be the sole property of just one individual and it most certainly ought not to be the sole preserve of an able bodied individual.
Better still if you can conjure up a ‘youth’ railway group for a Saturday morning. Yes I know, a right pain in the posterior, but it’s only once a week and if you can get your hands on some train driver’s caps and whistles for the kids, you certainly won’t regret it. Kerching!
And there really is no need to worry about encroachment. After you have ticked all the ‘community’ and ‘inclusion’ boxes on the funding applications, you will be free to indulge yourself in your railway for the majority of the time – what’s the odd Saturday morning when all that lovely cash is at stake? You could even open up a ‘railway’ café in your garden shed, sell accessories in the loft. It just gets better.
Why not? There’s plenty of other so-called community organisations doing just that, ensuring that all the right boxes are ticked. Then, when you have grown to a certain size, you too could set your sights on grabbing even more cash by employing a full-time ‘funding’ officer charged with ensuring all that public dosh keeps rolling on in.
Yes, it really is that easy, once you know the magic words.
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